So i have like the best pair of Levis 511s ever. they’re kinda black, starting to fade to a calm pastel gray. I never wash them because i like to keep the smell of the night on them. Well i went to a costume party last Saturday and i think i got a little to much beer and someones vomit on them. Obviously i had to wash these ratchet ass jeans of mine. So this morning when i pulled them out of the dryer i noticed they were a little more snug then the usual. I didn’t mind because i was late for work.
So I work at my school as a tutor. all i do it walk around a large room with at least 30 tables filled with students cramming for their test. I got bored and my mind started to wander. I was just day dreaming about this girl i’ve been talking to. I couldn’t get this her out of my mind, not in a perverted way. I was just thinking about everything we talked about places we went. I was just walking around the room dazed and confused. Until this average looking girl with green blue eyes and blond hair called me over. She needed help with some calculus problem. I just stood by the table because there wasn’t any room to sit. The table she sat at was filled with other students in her class. She kept looking down at where i would have hang my name tag, at the side of my pocket. So i looked down to see if she was simply trying to read my name. That’s when i noticed my boner was less than a foot from her face. She didn’t lean away her eyes just kept jumping from her book, my face, and my side pocket. I felt kinda bad, i didnt want her to think that i was hard for her. I just had a lot on my mind. So i bent down on one knee to try to hid it from the rest of the table.
I walked away with a stack of papers in my hand and a childish grin on my face. One of my co workers asked me if i was alright. I told her not to laugh or make a scene. as i lifted my stack of papers, she made a kind of hiccup. I ran to the rest room to make adjustments. I tried pointing him north but his head kept popping over the fence. I just waited in the restroom thinking about math, trying to force the blood back to my brain.
so today was awkward
Ok here I go
Part 1 (the land of Ooo)
So adventure time is about this magical land called Ooo everything looks like a lush forest with old cars and random left over human artifacts everywhere. There an underground subways system, mutated humans living underground and anthropomorphic animals or candy people walking around. Giving all this information adventure time is a post post-apocalyptic utopia. They even talk about the great mushroom war during the Finn and Jake movie nights. This lead me to believe that the great mushroom war (nuclear war) transformed all the inhabitants of the earth to mutate into candy people. Immortals like the Ice king and Marceline often have flash backs of them running around in the wreckage of a city.
Part 2 (Finns day dreams)
So as in the pictures above, Finn is looking into a mirror and sees himself with a pointed nose, average human eyes, and a robotic arm. The second photo shows this alternative Finn waking up from a day dream.
So adventure time is simply Finns day dreams. What boy wouldn’t want to day dream about fighting monsters, going on quest, and being the Hero. Finn lost his arm because there was a war going on in his home town. A bomb was dropped on his house which cause him to lose his arm. His father was a scientist that fabricated a bionic arm for fin before he left for war. His remorse makes him want to live in a time far after the war when he can be the hero that he never had.
Jake the Dog is simply Finns best friend. Jake is the only friend that Finn has. Finn and his mom have been living alone on a country side farm. Before Finn was born his parents adopted a dog, a year later Finn was born (think of the king of the hill episode ladybird helped Hank and Peggy conceive bobby). Finn gets lonely on his family’s farm and constantly wishes he had an older brother. or at least a friend to talk to.
The ice king is actually Finns be his dad. When finns mom was called him you can see a wedding ring on her finger. The Ice King (formerly Simon Petrikov) use to be a scientist before the nuclear war. We can think of Nazi Germany during the war. The Nazi would kidnap every scientist and force them to make weapons of mass destruction. This is why Finn hates the Ice King. He would believe that his father is the cause of the war.
All the Princes, well that’s just Finn day dreaming about the girls he’s loved. PB (aka Bonnibel Bubblegum) is Finn’s paramour. She now lives in a faraway kingdom to study science. Bonnibel would have been some girl that Finn knew before the war. She moved to a faraway country to escape the war. Now she’s going to college to become a scientist. He can never be with her no matter how much he loved her. Finn doesn’t find any of the other princesses attractive. Because the only girl he meet while he hit puberty was Bonnibel. So he just made up girlfriends like a hot dog or wild berries. LSP is just some fat girl that likes Fin.
In the first season of adventure time we saw Marceline come home from a long trip around the world. She then took over Finn and Jake’s tree house because she said she use to live there. The real Finn took over Marceline room when she moved away to college. When she came back home she wanted her room back. This forced Finn and Jake to find a new bedroom in their tiny farm house. Marceline felt bad because she found Fin and Jake camping in the forest behind their farm. She now lives on her own but she still likes to come back home to spy on Fin and Jake.
Marceline is Fins older cousin. In one the flashback little Marceline was crying alone in some city ruins. When the Ice King finally found her he bought her a teddy bear to cheer her up. In real life, Ice King (Simon) took Marceline to the city to visit her relatives. Marceline got lost in the chaos of the busy city. To make up for it he bought her a teddy bear and said he would never leave her like her father did. Marceline’s father was a business man who abandons her after her mom died. So Simon was the one who saved her from the wreckage of the world. He wrote he a song before the Nazi took him “This magic keeps me alive But, it’s making me crazy And, I need to save you But, who’s going to save me” - I Remember You. The Nazi were going to take Marceline away for being a Jew. But the Ice king said NO he will go instead because they needed a scientist with magical powers. The crown he wore was the knowledge to make a nuclear bomb. The same bomb that caused the Nuclear Winter. Now Marceline is just a stereotypical teenager who likes to stay up late and listen to hardcore music. This might be why Finn thinks she is a Vampire. She dated ash because she had daddy issues.
This is just my theory of adventure time. I have no idea why i’m so obsessed with this show. I wish i could just keep writing more I have a theory on how the Lich is Finn’s psychologist. Earl of Lemongrab is PB’s crazy stepfather. and Flame Princess is Finn’s lust for Pyromania. This is no kids show!
you can have my money and my liberality
But no one, No ONE! gets in the way of me seeing boobs.
i love this book